I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Look Back.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is universally recognized as an action movie legend. However, in the midst of his blockbuster fame in the 1980s and 1990s, he also delivered several critically acclaimed comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its 35-year mark this December.

The Role and That Line

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger portrays a hardened detective who poses as a kindergarten teacher to catch a killer. Throughout the film's runtime, the crime storyline serves as a simple backdrop for Schwarzenegger to have charming scenes with children. The most unforgettable involves a little boy named Joseph, who out of nowhere announces and declares the stoic star, “It's boys who have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” The Terminator replies icily, “Thank you for that information.”

That iconic child was brought to life by former young actor Miko Hughes. Beyond this role featured a character arc on Full House as the bully to the Olsen twins and the pivotal role of the child who returns in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with multiple films in development. He also engages with fans at the con circuit. Not long ago shared his memories from the production over three decades on.

Memories from the Set

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I don't recall being four. Do you remember anything from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're flashes. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you got the part in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would take me to auditions. Often it was a mass tryout. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all simply wait around, go into the room, be in there for a very short time, deliver a quick line they wanted and that was it. My parents would feed me the lines and then, as soon as I could read, that was probably the first stuff I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was very kind. He was enjoyable. He was good-natured, which I suppose makes sense. It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a productive set. He was great to work with.

“It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a big action star because I was told, but I had not actually watched his movies. I felt the importance — it was exciting — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was merely entertaining and I was eager to interact with him when he was available. He was occupied, of course, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd tense up and we'd be dangling there. He was exceptionally kind. He purchased for each child in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was a major status symbol. This was the must-have gadget, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It finally gave out. I also have a genuine metal whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all got a whistle as well.

Do you remember your experience as being fun?

You know, it's interesting, that movie is such a landmark. It was a major production, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the legendary director, visiting Astoria, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was brand new. That was the hot thing, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the bigger kids would ask for my help to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the infamous quote, do you remember the context? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word provocative meant, but I knew it was provocative and it got a big laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given special permission in this case because it was funny.

“My mom thought hard about it.”

How it was conceived, from what I understand, was they were still developing characters. Certain bits of dialogue were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the kids together, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, presumably someone in charge came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Let me think about it, let me sleep on it" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she had doubts, but she felt it will probably be one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.